No Emotions Here!
In Amy Cunningham's essay, "Why Women Smile", she explains that women are required to smile and hide whatever they are feeling in the inside. When I read this essay I found a lot of truth in how women are expected to smile regardless of how they really feel. Basically, women are told to lie to themselves and others as Cunningham says, " 'Your real emotions are not welcome here."
My parents constently tell me to smile and when I refuse they get worried and concerned about me. I save my smiles for things that derserve them like when I hear a funny joke or actually feel happy about something.
Once I was finished reading Cunninghams essay I immediately thought, isn't this the same as the saying, "Men aren't supposed to cry" I mean when you think about it, women are suppose to smile because that is what is expected of them, likewise, men aren't supposed to cry because they are expected to be strong and not show weakness.
My reasoning is, if you feel bad, cry and if your happy, laugh because if you hide what you feel, it will only bottle up inside and make you feel alone when, in fact, your not.
Do you think women and men should cover up what they feel?
20 comments:
I totally agree with Hope K. I think that people should express their feelings freely. Keeping your feelings inside doesnt help at all. If you are sad then be sad you dont have to smile to make anyone else feel better. If your happy then smile, laugh and just be happy.
I agree with you Hope because yo should not cover up how you feel whether happy or sad.
When it comes to men I agree with you there because it helps them to understand that there is someone there to listen to them just as they would if the situation was switched
i agree with you Hope. I don't think women and men should cover up how they feel. If you are happy, sad, mad, or even angry, you shouldn't hold your emotions in. I smile all the time because im always a happy person, but the minute i don't, everyone knows somethings wrong. I let my feelings out because keeping it bottled up inside will make you feel worse.
I agree Hope, people should let their emotions out (it's easier and healthier).
Cunningham is right when she says that "real emotions [aren't] welcome" in the real world.
I'm not a happy person, but I still smile constantly. Like Cunningham says, it is a way of disarming situations and making good first impressions. Going back to the idea that it is a way of showing meekness, who doesn't want a friend/coworker that, at first glance, isn't going to fight you?
I agree, Hope, that bottling up emotions is not healthy in the least. Some people put on that they are happy all the time when thats obviously not the case. Everyone has problems and everyone gets upset. Things like death and loss are unavoidable, they are part of life.
There is a difference in a long term satisfaction with life and short term happiness. People who love life and live it joyfully won't necessarily have a smile on their face, so don't always correlate smiles with actual happiness.
I agree with you Hope, I dont think that men and women should not cover up their emotions. At first I used to believe that you have to be strong and not show weakness in any way, shape, or form because that is what was drilled into me when I was younger. Now that I have grown older I realize that you should wear your emotions on your sleeves. That is were my boyfriend and I have bumped heads alot because I would not tell him that something was bothering me and I would just keep it all bottled up inside and then eventually I would explode and tell him everything. It was not healthy for me to do that to myself and it was not considerant of his feelings because when I would pop he was so confused and didn't know what he did. In actuality it was all me and not him. So I agree with you 100%.
I think that everyone should show their emotions. But I also think that you can show them at the wrong time. I have to be honest if I'm sad I'm not going to hide that felling. If I need to cry I'm going to cry. But I really don't throw everything out for everybody to see. There is a time and a place for everything.
I agree with you Hope, I go through the same thing sometimes professors come to me after class and ask me what's wrong because I haven't smiled all class, but I feel if there's nothing for me to smile about then why go out the way and smile if I really don't want to. As for men, sometimes I think that men don't believe that women or whoever is really there to listen to their problems therefore they choose to keep emotions bottled inside though there's no reason to.
I agree with you, Hope. Keeping your feelings bottled up inside is not healthy. But I don't think it is necessary for everyone to know how you feel.
I would probrably have like two or three really close friends that I can confide into. Other people don't really need to be in my buisness though. So I have to agree with Christopher as well.
I disagree with the fac tthat we should show our emotions at all times. We shouldn't it simply isn't life is about. We have to put a strong face on and go out into the world and face things.
It is much stronger to put a smile on one's face when having a horrible day than it is to simply look depressed and try to get symptahy from the world around. So i disagree I think that by wearing our sadness, our confusion, or even our stresses on our faces is a sign of weakness one that in today's society we are not able to afford.
I disagree with Hope in the way she says that people should not hide their emotions an express their feelings all the time. There are appropriate times where you can do that. You cannot for example, if you work at a store, yell at or cry to your customers only because you are having a bad day. Also, not everyone is interested in our problems, sometimes we just have to hold on, put a smile in our faces, and be strong.
I agree with Amy Cunningham's conclusion that to frequently women use a smile to cover up their true feelings. However, this phenomenon is not exclusive to women. Today too many people of all ages and genders use smiles to hide their real thoughts. This is not something that we as Americans should be proud of being know for.
I agree with you Hope. I know exactly what you mean when you gave the example of how your parents always tell you to smile and when you refuse they get worried. My friends always see me in a happy, upbeat mood but if I "forget" to smile and act all happy they always ask me if I am okay. That really aggravates me. I feel that when you are happy your emotions will show it and the same goes to if your are mad or sad, and people should not force someone to be happy all of the time.
I honestly believe that neither men or women should cover up how they feel because it would always put them in a place to where they would be considered fake or not real to themselves or other individuals around them.
I also agree. Smiles are very nice and important for a healthy attitude. You can tell many things with a smile.
However some people don't smile at all, regardless if their happy or not. I think it's nice to see when somebody is having trouble and still smile trying to have a possitive attitude, trying to move on.
I agree with everyone exspecially chris. There is a certain time to show your emotions and if you do show them don't lash out on anybody.
Plus, I don't want you to think of me as a person who priles on women who are unhappy(happly engaged) but I love to see women who aren't having a good day because I know it means so much more when someone cares enough to stop what they are doing and make you smile to brightin up your day.
I agree with Hope K. Keeping you feelings inside with just make the matter worse for you.
I agree with you Hope. Men and women are no different from one another. Feelings are meant to be express that is why they are called feelings. I don't express my feelings as I should but I do eventually express them when needed. When I'm happy you may see a smile or playful joy when I'm sad you'll see an upside down smile and wrinkles in the eyes. Heck and even when I'm mad you see fire from my ears and me exploding. But you will never see me cry unless I've been hurt very deeply. I feel to get me to cry you would have to had broken my spirit and my pride. Like you said keeping you feelings inside isn't healthy. If you have a jar of jelly beans and they are filled to the limit and you pour more what eventually happens, they run over. That's like someones emotions they can come a limit until an over flow and once that has happened it makes one a little disturbed. So yes I hope I agree with you 100%
I totally agree. People’s emotions should be freely expression in body language and facial expressions. There is a saying, ‘wear your heart on your sleeve,’ and it is totally true. People should not be ashamed of how they feel. Isn’t emotion how people communicate? Women are the most emotional things on the planet, so I disagree with Cunningham when she says women should hide there emotions.
lakisha s said...
I agree with Hope K. in her statements about women being able to express their emotions. Everyone should be able to show their emotions as long as no one is being harmed. I will not let a person tell me how to express my feelings or hide my emotions. To be completely yourself is to express how you feel. Men is much cases what women to hide their emotions and act like everything is okay. So I definitely agree with Hope K.
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